Any one who knows me, knows that I go on about children not having sufficient stimulation these days and I have even been heard to say that there is no such thing as 'too much'. I now wish to amend that somewhat following a meal out on Saturday night.
The next table had two parents and an obvious 'only child'. The poor girl aged about 4 years was constantly taught and tested throughout the meal. The parents said absolutely nothing to each other through out their prawn puree starters and chicken kormas, they just bombarded poor Victoria with question after question after question.
There was no encouragement and occasional undeserved criticism. 'Lets play Ispy Verity, you go first,' said Daddy. 'I spy something beginning with pink,' said the poor child. 'Clever', I thought for a pre-schooler but Daddy didn't think so. It was met with scorn and derision.
'What letters can you see on that sign,Victoria?' asked Mummy. 'I can't see a sign', said the poor child hoping to avoid the lesson'.
'What does 'stunning' mean asked Daddy?'. 'It means really good', said the child. 'No!', scoffed Daddy ' it doesn't. If I called Mummy stunning would you agree?' At this point the poor child just wanted to escape and so did I!!!
When a man collapsed on the floor, they ignored her questions about it and re-directed her to her food. This could have been a really good discussion topic as the para-medics arrived and began to minister to him but they were too busy 'teaching'.
There were lots of lessons the child could have learned about social language and conversation at a meal table. The parents could have been good role models and demonstrated the etiquette of eating out and how she should behave. They could have enjoyed her company and each others but they obviously thought the tirade of questioning, is what they should be doing. They even kept giving us smug looks as if they were showing us how it should be done (We were without our 6). How I kept my mouth shut, I don't know!!
My book, 'How to prepare your child for school' isn't ready yet but when it it is I'll keep a copy in my bag... to give to parents like them? NO, to smack them round the head with..... hard!!
The most recent Hello press release looks at TV watching survey with interesting results. The poll was carried out to mark the launch of a new programme which started yesterday for children of pre-school age – Raa Raa the Noisy Lion – and a new ten point plan for parents on TV Time, devised by experts to mark the Hello campaign, 2011 national year of communication. We'll look at the 10 point plan in another blog post. As with any survey, people will give the answer they think they should give or the one they think you want, rather than whole-hearted truthfulness and I believe that there is an element of this which sways the results. 1000 parents of 2 - 6 year olds were approached:
Almost all of the parents (93%) let their young children watch television and contrary to popular belief, seven out of ten parents do not feel guilty about allowing their children to watch TV. Of those parents, 42% think TV is a great way for kids to learn but only 16% always watch with their kids for ‘bonding time’, with 25% using TV as a ‘babysitter’.
I would say that the TV is used as a babysitter by a huge number as we've ALL done that at some point or other including me! As for it being educational.... it depends on the programme. It needs to be age-appropriate and meaningful and should be shared with an adult. The 54% who allow their children to watch ‘adult’ programmes, (with Eastenders, The X Factor and Coronation Street being voted the most common) surely can't believe that they are teaching the child anything?? Plus, nearly 78% of parents’ claim the two hours their children spend watching TV each day is done alone.... 2 hours??? Most pre-schoolers I know watch far more than that!! 66% of parents don’t know the characters or storylines from the shows their kids are watching and when parents do co-view approximately 20% sit in silence with their children. Very few (15%) are using TV programmes as a ‘conversation starter’ when the TV is turned off.
It hi-lights that parents need more information and advice on suitable TV programmes and how to co-view with their child.
Smart Talkers Pre-school Communication groups and Small Talk Speech & Language Therapy are supporting The Hello campaign, which aims to make children and young people’s communication development a national priority. We would recommend Raa Raa the Noisy Lion, as a quality television programme for 2-4 year olds. The new series explores children’s communication skills through the use of Raa Raa’s 4 Rs – repetition, rhyme, rhythm and retelling.
For more information go to www.raaraathenoisylion.com and to find out about the Hello campaign visit www.hello.org.uk.
